Day 78. Family

Family is what you are born into, most of the time. In my case, it was both what I was born in to, and what my sisters and brothers were born into. Ok - that sentence doesn't sound sane so let me explain that to you. 

When my mom died to say my dad was lost would be an understatement. He was looking for companionship and to fill the hole in his heart. My younger self would never understand, but my almost 60 year old self gets it.

So after dating for a little while he found what he was looking for, in the last place he would have thought to look. The trash.

My dad worked at Patrick Cudahy meat processing plant. As he was leaving one night he heard cries for help. Like a knight in shining armor my dad came to the rescue and pulled the damsel in distress from her metal dungeon. That damsel ended up catching his eye. 

He found out that she had lost her husband as well. I wonder if she told him right away that she had five children. I wonder if he told her....I would have liked to see their faces when they did the math. I guarantee you it was nothing like Lucille Ball and Henry Fonda's faces in the movie "Yours, Mine and Ours".

In any event they started dating. I was too young to notice the subtle change in his attitude. I do know he seemed happy again, and was home more often - well sort of. He was home when he wasn't out on a date.

Then the day came. The day he told us that he had asked the new woman in his life to become his wife. She agreed. 

I've mentioned before about meeting for the first time our new brothers and sisters. It was surreal to think that this clan would somehow live under one roof. 

The wedding was fun, everyone had a role in it. Gary and Rick were alter boys (they were both over 6 ft tall so calling them alter boys sounds funny). They were klutzy and added more smiles and laughs to the service. My dad had his brother, Frank as best man and my mom-to-be had her sister, Pat as maid of honor.

Aside from a few tripped over lights and stumbling of vows the wedding was picture perfect. The reception at "Steinbachers" in Cudahy was the most fun I had in a long time. I danced with my friend, Randy and enjoyed getting to know my new brothers and sisters better. For the first time that I could remember I not only had Grandparents again, but aunts and uncles that lived in Wisconsin!

The next few days were spent consolidating two homes into one. That was something, carrying boxes through back yards and alleyways. We only moved a few blocks over, but it was a new life for me, leaving Ruthie, Tommy, and the twins behind I would soon discover Chris, Kelly, Patti and Laura. 

But I digress. 

Our families became one. Even the Cudahy Reminder took note - we were a news item!  Soon after my parents gave us the news that our family was going to grow even more. My new mom was pregnant. Of course we were all excited. Chris arrived that December just in time for Christmas. We had to wait for my parents to bring him home from the hospital to open the mound of presents in the living room - but we don't hold that against him (too much).  

The family was complete when Mary Beth came home a year later. She arrived in June, which was nice of her to spread out the birthdays a bit. After all - of the 14 people in our family 7 of us were born in the months of October-January. 

So there you have it, yours-mine-and-ours! They had made the movie a reality. 

I'd love to say that we were all forever happy and got along great. But let's be real. No family ever gets along all of the time, even in the movie the kids fought. There are arguments, taking sides, us against them....but you know what? There were some great times too. Sneaking out of the house, annoying the neighbors, ordering Golden Chicken or Pizza on the nights our parents went bowling. Sunday dinners, dishes after Sunday dinner, the Thanksgiving football games. Big family Christmas parties, Weddings - lots of weddings. Baby showers - lots of baby showers. Graduations, more weddings, and so on.

I love telling people about my family. It has been the best and even though we didn't always get along I'm always excited to talk to a brother or sister I haven't heard from in years. No matter what happens, they are family. 

Thankfully the internet and social media helps us keep in touch on our own terms. I can catch up with a sibling I haven't heard from in a while and just like that I am back in that big family I love to brag about.

Our parents are gone now, but as the "Pointer Sister's" song goes - "we are family".

Dedicated to: Bonnie, Karen, Ginny, Cathy, Rick, Gary, Judy, Mike, Laurie, Chris and Mary Beth. and of course, our parents - Ralph and Irene, Betty and Eric.