I've always liked being the center of attention. Truly, I am not shy (although I was once given a bad performance rating because my manager thought I was) and I like being the leader. Taking care of others has been inbred in me at an early age.
Losing my mother was one ingredient. Although, I didn't use it to get things I wanted - at least not in the beginning. I really didn't understand much about death or the finality of it. I guess I just figured my mom had gone somewhere else and I'd see her again someday. At least, that's what the nuns at St. Fredrick's church used to tell me. So I was good with that. People left and came back later to tell you all sorts of stories. I was just waiting for her to return.
Cudlacs was a small corner grocery on Layton Avenue. It had shelves of groceries, a couple of shelves of things kids would want to buy (jump ropes, crayons, coloring books, candy, etc.) a bread aisle, household items and a meat counter. Nothing too elaborate but enough for you to get food for the table and a good conversation with the cashiers or butchers. The entire store would take up maybe the pharmacy section of the grocery stores around today.
It was a neighborhood store in as such as we knew each other. The cashiers knew the families and the butcher would know what type of meat your family liked and how it should be cut. It was that kind of a neighborhood store.
News of the Nebel's losing their mother spread across the neighborhood streets. It was why the neighbors looked out for us - I'm sure it's what led so many of them to allow me into their homes and gardens. Probably why the cashier would allow me to purchase anything I wanted and pay for it with stones.
register.
I told Tommy and Patrick about my new form of payment and they didn't believe me. I had to show them. We walked down the alley and crossed the street, passing an empty lot along the way and grabbed a few rocks in my hand.
We went in and each picked up a few items. Some crayons, coloring books, jacks and candy bars. We walked up to the cashier and handed her the items. She looked at the items, looked at me and my goofy smile, took the rocks and we left.
Tommy and Patrick were baffled. They had no idea what just happened. I had actually bought candy and books with rocks.
That night I was in my room when I heard my father come in. "Carole" his voice boomed up the stairs. "Yes?" was my answer. "Come down here". I went down to the kitchen table. I was certain I was in trouble, but my dad had a smile on his face. I guess the cashier had called him.
"You know, rocks aren't money." he continued "you can't buy things from the store with rocks". I looked at him as was about to tell him he was wrong, but he stopped me. "The manager of Cudlacs called me and explained what was going on. The cashier was taking the rocks, but adding the cost of all the items to our account. We have one so we can get groceries before payday." "We owe her $10 for the extra items you've bought the last few weeks." I gave out a bit of a squeak. That was a lot of money - and back then it probably would have bought us enough groceries for a week. "They are going to let us pay it off a little at a time. I'll do it this time, but you'll have to stop. No more candy sprees - ok?"
"OK", I answered.
The weeks went on and the account was paid off. My sweet tooth started to get the better of me. I needed money. I needed to be able to get some goodies and I knew rocks wouldn't buy me anything.
Then I remembered, my dad had a penny collection he kept in a metal box in his bedroom. It wasn't much, but it would buy me the candy I craved. I didn't think of it as stealing - I mean, after all it was just sitting in the box and it was just coins. He probably had forgotten he even had them.
I went into his room and grabbed the box and took it up to my room. I'm not sure where anyone was so I sat in the upstairs pantry and opened the it. The books with the penny collections were there, but something bigger caught my eye. Five silver coins - bigger than quarters. I had remembered seeing them once a long time ago. These had to be worth more than a penny and weren't rocks.
I grabbed Tommy and Patrick and headed back to Cudlacs. We went in and grabbed supplies that would last us for a while and went up to the cashier. She gave me 'that' look. You know, the 'I know you' look.
She added up the supplies, put them in a bag and asked for the cash. I handed her the coins. It must have been enough since she didn't ask for any more.
We went back to Tommy's house and sat in the backyard and ate our candy in the sunshine. We couldn't use the doll house since the bees had found it - it was their territory now. I finished what I could, wrapped the rest up in a scarf and headed up to my bedroom.
I was sitting in there coloring when my dad came home. "CAROLE JEAN!" Oh - that didn't sound good, he used my middle name. "Get down here".
I made it as far as the second floor landing before I saw my dad's face. It was not a happy, smiling face. "Did you go to Cudlacs?" Oh man, he knew - but he was asking, so that meant he wasn't sure.
"Yes" came my answer.
"Did you pay with money?" he asked. Still heated, but softening.
"Yes".
"Did you take the money from my box?"
Busted! He knew!
I'm not sure what came over me, but I couldn't tell the truth. I would be in so much trouble.
"No" my voice trailed off.
"Come Here". I heard the belt being taken off - that was never a good sign. I slowly walked the rest of the way down and into the kitchen. My dad was sitting at the table and in front of him were the five coins I had used earlier.
"Do you know what these are?" I shook my head 'no'. "They are silver dollars - your mother got one for each of you. I was holding on to them until you were married. Thankfully the cashier saved them for me or they would be gone forever." Side note - I really didn't like that cashier much after that day. Snitch that she was!
"But that's not the worst thing you did today", he continued, "you lied. I can forgive you taking the coins, but don't you ever, lie to me."
He took me over his knee and delivered my punishment." My sister Judy told me that she had never seen him so mad.
I can't tell you what hurt more. The spanking, or the fact that I had lied to my dad and hurt his feelings. I never wanted to hurt him and I did, big time.
I learned my lesson. After that I earned the money I used to buy candy. Even if it meant digging in the dump for discarded soda bottles. I never lied to my dad again, as hard as that is to believe, I told the truth most of the time. I mean - I am only human.
On my wedding day I received a small box. When I opened it up I found the silver dollar inside. I guess I am happy that the cashier ratted me out after all.
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